yarpnews

Budget airline suggests you keep your kids in the overhead lockers

In Crazy YarpNews on April 15, 2014 at 2:39 pm

 

Save room and money keeping your kids in the overhead locker.

Save room and money keeping your kids in the overhead locker.

Skyan Air, the no thrills, low budget airline have come up with several ingenious ways to save their customers even more money. Well known for charging nothing except a teeny-weeny $1 for a seat to the other side of the world (plus $5 seatbelt duty, $2 washroom fee, $10 for any item of hand luggage, $40 per suitcase, $16 per PB&J sandwich and apple lunch pack, $10 per mile flight tax, $50 runway tax, $100 airport tax, $30 fuel surcharge and $50 handling and administration fee per person). The Walmart of the air is now offering parents who fly with children the chance to take part in a special promotion.

This latest budget brainwave offers customers the opportunity to save money by putting their children in their overhead lockers.

We think this promotion will give travelling parents a range of flexible options. Putting your child in the overhead locker will of course be cheaper than buying it a seat. It will also put any parents mind at rest because throughout the flight they know exactly where their child is – above their heads. We just warn parents to mind their heads whilst opening the overhead lockers as the contents are liable to fall out.

Just another money saving opportunity for Skyan Air passengers.

Student prank drives pensioner around the bend

In Crazy YarpNews on April 12, 2014 at 12:33 pm

 

Going the wrong way? Sssh! No one need every know!

Going the wrong way? Sssh! No one need ever know!

A cruel joke played by a bunch of student pranksters left a little old lady trapped on a roundabout for three whole days. Roundabouts or traffic circles are notoriously difficult to navigate at the best of times, but for one poor pensioner a trip to the library turned into a trip to hell. Unbeknownst to Miss Constance Spirals (82) the usual route she took once a week, on a Thursday, was the centre of a very well organized college prank. The group of freshmen from Privet University, Shrubland, Australia arranged to block every entrance and exit route on the roundabout with a set of large, portable bushes. The cunning kids waited until poor unfortunate Miss Spirals drove on to the circle and before she could exit they deployed their bushes, instantly trapping the simple spinster. With no means of escape the stupid old biddy kept going round and around, hoping the next turn would lead to a way out, but each turn just lead to another hedge. Three days later, friends and neighbours of Miss Spirals realized she was missing and raised the alarm. Police estimate that by the time they found the aged one she had completed over 3,000 circles. Miss Spirals is now back home and although she is still a little dizzy and confused, no one has really noticed. The Police are currently on the lookout for a bunch of leafy students who are disguised as bushes.

Mad Barber of Seville has bad hair days

In Crazy YarpNews, World on April 9, 2014 at 12:02 pm

Two of Mr Badairdos unfortunate victims

Police in Seville, Spain have today arrested a failed barber for breaking into people’s homes and cutting their hair while they slept.

Armando Badairdos (59) was considered such a bad barber that he had previously been banned from every barber shop and hairdressing salon in Seville. So he took to breaking and entering into people’s homes and practicing his hairdressing skills on his innocent victims while they lay asleep in their beds. The result was a tenfold spike in bad hair days.

“We believe that Senor Badairdos has been doing this for some time,” said police spokesman Nicalao Tabaddos. “The trouble is that when his victims woke up in the morning they put their crazy hair-dos down to bad bed hair. “

“Even if they had a clue, who would want to admit that they had hair done by a madman? If he had been better at styling hair he might have got away with it for longer.  He was a bad barber and an even worse hairdresser… but if you are going to cut people’s hair while they are asleep in their beds you have to expect to only have access to one side of their heads. People only really noticed when he started applying hair extensions. Everyone started waking up with a patch of hair that was much longer than when they first went to sleep. “

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