yarpnews

Leaves are dying

In Crazy YarpNews on November 8, 2011 at 1:25 pm

Don't do it! A sad, suicidal leaf about to jump!

Don’t be alarmed, but we bring alarming news…  there are leaves out there … and they are dying. Yes you heard right, leaves are dying people! We know its true because top Biologists have this week announced that there is an alarming pattern of intentional leaf deaths or ‘suicide’ amongst the UK’s deciduous tree population.

It would appear that each year during the months of September, October and November the rate of leaf suicide rises to more than 645 million deaths.

As yet, no one can work out why the leaves feel the need to kill themselves, but researchers from Partridge University in Norwich (who had an “Ahaaa” moment) believe it has something to do with the trees getting depressed during Autumn. “We feel there is a definite connection between the leaves committing suicide and the trees feeling the winter blues,” said Professor Amy Anidiot. “We urge people to spare a thought for the trees and next time they are near one, give it a hug, tell it a joke or tickle it a bit, see if you can cheer it up.”

In the majority of cases the main method of suicide involved jumping from a tree with only a handful of leaves preferring to kill themselves by jumping on to railway tracks.

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