Posts Tagged ‘nut’

Visit the Safari Park to ‘chimp your ride’

In Animals, Crazy YarpNews on March 13, 2014 at 1:17 pm

Visiting a Safari Park is always an adventure. Everyone expects to get leered at by the lions, gawked at by a giraffe and have their car systematically stripped down by a pack of primates.

It is no secret that the monkeys cleverly take those stripped car parts and turn them in to their own sweet rides. Having opposable thumbs makes them excellent grease monkeys. Indeed, many car crooks have slept easy in their beds, knowing that they can quickly get rid of any evidence by monkeying around with the primates.

However, if you are lucky enough to pay a visit to Monkey Jungle in Banana Bay, you could be in for a treat, as the monkey mechanics there have gone one step further by offering their customers a range of custom built baboon saloon cars. Each car off the production line will be unique in every way, depending upon the vehicle the parts were originally swiped from.

If a custom built baboon saloon is not for you, the apes are offering another alternative. They will (using their monkey mates’ monkey wrenches and monkey nuts) chimp your ride.

So, whether you fancy a brand new baboon saloon or you prefer to have the apes chimp your ride, having a monkey’ed up motor will make you king of the jungle.


Giraffe in nut allergy scare

In Crazy YarpNews, Science/tech on March 24, 2011 at 3:28 pm

Cagem Up Zoo's new bouncy castle

Did you know that giraffes are allergic to peanuts? No? Well unfortunately neither did the zoo keepers at Cagem Up Zoo in Arkansas. So no one stopped a group of school children giving the zoo’s giraffe, Patch a good helping of the salty, nutty treats. What happened next was truly nuts.

Poor Patch has swelled to nearly three times his normal size.

“We aint never had no trouble before,” said Head Zoo Keeper, Ida Hatebeast (39). “But then we ain’t never had a giraffe before.”

“Still, it ain’t all bad, cos now we have a bouncy castle.”

Nut job’s search for lucky nuts

In Crazy YarpNews on January 16, 2011 at 2:56 pm

One Singaporean resident has taken his quest for lucky nuts to a whole new level. Businessman Ho Kee Dokey, 52, started his search for lucky nuts after he heard of the tale of Mr Lee Yern Wai, 55, who is said to have struck it rich after being given a peanut shell that contained five lucky peanuts.

According to local gossip, several years ago Mr Lee Yern Wai was broke, his company had failed and he was bankrupt.  However, Mr Lee wanted to change his luck and so he joined a package tour to Thailand’s holiest sites.  The tour took him to Wat Sawang Arom where Mr Lee met a monk. After hearing his tale of woe the monk gave Mr Lee the rare five-in-one peanut telling him that if he kept it and worshipped it, his luck would change.

Nuts in hand, Mr Lee went back to Singapore and soon his luck turned and he became increasingly successful in various ventures. Mr Lee was so pleased with his new found fortune that he proudly showed his friends his nut, which he kept on a pedestal and worshiped.

News about the remarkable five-in-one peanut spread throughout Singapore and soon everyone including Mr Ho Kee Dokey wanted a piece of the action. Unfortunately five-in-one peanuts are very rare. Mr Ho drove everyone in Singapore nuts looking for them, but he could only find the worthless four-in-one shell type. Determined to improve his luck Mr Ho then paid to travel to Thailand and visit the same temple that the lucky Mr Lee had visited. Whilst there he offered the monks 2,000 Baht (around $65) for any lucky five-in-one nut, but either the monks did not have a lucky nut or they didn’t want to share their nuts with Mr Lee because no one took him up on his offer.

In desperation, the nut job began to scour all the markets and stalls near the temple to see if he could find some lucky nuts there – but his search was in vain and he had to return to Singapore empty handed.

Unfortunately for Mr Ho, his search for lucky nuts cost him a great deal in both time and money. His wife left him because of his crazy obsession and all his friends now think he is nuts. But Mr Ho maintains that all this will change once he gets his hands on some lucky nuts.


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