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Posts Tagged ‘weird’

Ear-gasm – the orgasm for your ear

In Crazy YarpNews, Science/tech on May 5, 2014 at 1:07 pm

Picking you ear may not be the most romantic of moves, but for many Vietnamese a good bit of probing in the ear department is a popular pastime that can elicit moans of pure pleasure. Why? Because the Vietnamese know an age-old secret – your ear has a G-spot and if it’s poked and tickled in just the right way… well let’s just say ‘hang on to your socks.’

Now, sticking things in your ear is never recommended, one slip and you could end up damaging something important like your ear drum, leaving you moaning in pain rather than ecstasy. However, for the highly trained girls and boys of the Hoc Tocs (the barber-like shops) in Vietnam, ear picking is an art. So much so that a good ear picker will gather quite a following.

Popular ear pickers will have men and women lining up around the block to experience their unorthodox probing. Using delicate metal scoops and tiny tweezers, the ear pickers will carefully clean inside their customer’s ears. As well as removing ear wax, their probing tickles a delicate spot near the ear drum. For some people it feels like a tickle, but for others it is akin to great sex. It is not unknown for people to experience what can only be described as ‘ear-gasms’. That may explain why some Vietnamese men don’t tell their wives when they pop out for some ear picking.

So, the next time you want to playfully lick your finger and stick it in your friend’s ear, just think, you may be giving him more than a wet willy!

Bag-ette – the bag you can eat!

In Crazy YarpNews on May 2, 2014 at 12:52 pm

The Bag-ette - an ideal place to keep your dough

Fashion designers are well known for creating collections of unusual garb that although eye-catching on the cat walk have no practical purpose in our everyday lives. Who can forget Bjork’s swan dress or Britney Spears in her tartan diapers? However, in honour of Paris Fashion week, which started yesterday, Yarpnews thought we would share with our readers one of the more useful fashion designs, which is sure to become the toast of the high street.

The clever design team at Katja Gruijters (www.katjagruijters.nl) has used their loaf to come up with this handy bag-ette. This stylish bag is certainly a cut above the rest, made from bread, it’s a great place to store your dough and should you get hungry when you’re out and about, you’ve already got your hands on the beginnings of one great sandwich.

Whichever way you slice it, you can’t have your bag and eat it, but maybe that’s not such a crumby idea. Hopefully a larger suitcase version will soon be in development, so if you’re flying abroad and end up with excess baggage, you can eat it.

Pee Toylet is whizz idea

In Crazy YarpNews on April 3, 2014 at 4:58 pm

Sega’s new Toylet, a game to be pissed on

If you spend too long on toilet breaks you may be accused of flushing your life down the pan, but soon, thanks to Sega’s new Toylet, male commuters in Japan will be able to play in the bathroom all day long.

Fortunately, Sega are not taking the piss, their new dimension in gaming includes a urinal based pressure sensor which allows users to control four different games.

The first is ‘Manneken Pis’ in which the amount of urine you just peed out is calculated.

Next is ‘Graffiti Eraser’ which lets you use your hose to pee-blast graffiti off of a wall. A dirty game but if you have a lot of urine you could clean up.

Probably not a game for gay Toylet players, ‘The North Wind and Her’ turns your piss into wind which can be used to blow off a woman’s dress.

Finally, ‘Milk from Nose’ allows you to go head to head with the guy who used the urinal before you. In this sumo-style game the characters blow milk from their noses and try to push each other out of the sumo ring. The guy who has the strongest pressure wins.

The urinals are still in development, but if you ‘head’ to Japan you may get a chance to pee and play sometime in the near future. In the meantime the rest of the world will have to make do with the old fashioned bathroom games that our grandparents used to play, favorites like‘Chasing a cigarette butt down the urinal’ and ‘Seeing how high you can pee up a wall.’

Granny gangs terrorize neighborhood

In Crazy YarpNews on November 16, 2013 at 12:43 pm

Granny Gansta G-Ma and her crew, K-Nit, Pee-Daddy and Wrinkles

We are all aware of the rise of street gang culture; it is in our playgrounds, on our streets and in our clubs. Many of us not involved with a gang assume that street gangs are for the young with members either dying prematurely or growing up and so growing away from all things ‘gang’ by the time they are middle aged.  However for the old folks of Compton Manor in Philadelphia, Creamcheese, USA, the rise and rise of granny gangs has become a frightening reality.

One such gang is GG13 (the GG stands for Granny Gangsta and the 13 refers to the number of original granny gangstas who were once members of the Women’s Institute). GG13 runs the east side of the west side and the north side of the south side. Gangbangers Pee-Daddy, K-Nit, Wrinkles and G-Ma are regularly in trouble with the law for bad ass behavior and causing trouble in the neighborhood.

21 year old Dwayne Jacobs a strip club bouncer said, “They’re scary man, they all hang about the parks, you know what I am saying? Shouting, spitting and stealing from the local shops. It’s a disgrace man. All they do all day is click their false teeth and smell up the place. They need to be off our streets.”

Granny Gansta G-Ma defends her crew, “We is just chillin and kickin back, you know what I’m saying? Just cause these youngsters can’t hack it don’t mean they can pick on us, you know what I’m saying? They need to reee-lax, this shit is for real, you know what I’m saying? If someone don’t shut his mouth someone ain’t gonna make it to Bingo, you know what I’m saying”

If anyone does know what G-Ma is saying, please could they drop us a line at Yarpnews.

Strange footstool fossil discovered in Siberia

In Crazy YarpNews on March 7, 2011 at 1:14 pm

Yugo Digiditch and his fossilized footstool

A recent discovery of an unknown fossil in the frozen wastelands of Siberia currently has the scientific world jumping up and down with excitement.

What is believed to be a frozen footstool has been unearthed in the Yakutsk region in Russia’s far east.

“It’s an unbelievable find,” said Russian archeologist Yugo Digaditch. “We think it maybe a prehistoric stool – you know the kind you put your feet on or it could be a giant rabbit. We won’t really know until we thaw it out and get to look at it a bit more closely.”

“We do know that it is quite hairy … and it seems to smell a bit.”

Paleontologists throughout the world are eager to see this amazing discovery for themselves, but Mr Digaditch is keeping its exact location a secret.

“Some people have said that I am not experienced enough to handle this dig. But I say to those people, ‘Go to hell!’I have everything I need here. I am sure that if I use my hairdryer long enough and look hard enough the answers will be staring me in the face.”

Rooster gets revenge on owner who forced him to cock fight

In Crazy YarpNews on January 24, 2011 at 12:49 pm

A rebellious rooster who had been forced to take part in a cock fight took revenge on his owner by killing him.

Although incredibly cruel, cock fighting is still a very popular sport and to the villagers of Mohanpur, West Bengal, it is a great way to earn a few rupees – and if your bird wins, you also get a free chicken dinner (courtesy of their dead opponent).

Usually owners receive around $35 per fight, but on this fateful night one owner called Singai Song wanted to get his hands on some extra cash. So, instead of letting his prize winning cockerel rest between fights like the other birds, Mr Song forced his rooster back into the ring immediately after its first fight.

Understandably upset, the rooster tried to leave the ring several times, but Mr Song kept pushing him back in. After Mr Song accused him of being ‘chicken’ the bird was spitting feathers and he lashed out, directing the full force of his anger on to his bird brained owner.

Well, as anyone who has fought a prize winning cock will know, they are lethal opponents and unfortunately Mr Song was no match for his own bird. Within a few minutes of the fight starting Mr Song was laying dead, his throat slit by the razor blades he himself had attached to his rooster’s legs.

After the incident the fearful fowl flew the coop. Police are currently on the lookout for ‘an unknown rooster with black and red feathers’ that is believed to be armed and dangerous. If you see a bird matching that description do not approach it and certainly do not accuse it of being chicken.

 

Dirty monk’s dirty habit gets him in to trouble

In Crazy YarpNews on January 23, 2011 at 1:28 pm

In this latest strange but true story, a bad Buddhist monk had a stroke after he was caught having sex with a temple dog behind Sam Toei Temple in Pitsanuloke, Thailand.

Villagers were drawn to the scene by the howls of protest from the dog, which the monk had tied to a tree. After seeing the monk with the poor pooch the villagers called the police.

All the excitement was obviously too much for the 65-year-old monk to take because by the time officers arrived on the scene he was lying unconscious next to the animal. A bottle of dishwashing liquid was found next to him, presumably for use as a makeshift lubricant.

Rescuers rushed the monk to hospital, where he remains in a coma. Doctors said he had suffered a stroke and are not sure if he will survive. The monk was identified as Phoopan Chitupanarso. The Abbot of Wat Sam Toei, said Phoopan had been at the temple for only a few days.

Temple authorities were allegedly already preparing to ask him to leave because he had refused to provide references from his former temple and because he smelt like wet dog.

Police did not say what Phoopan would be charged with if he regains consciousness but there have been sniffs of a rumor about unpawful entry.

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